Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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