The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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