Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
