Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize