I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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