Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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