Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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