Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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