My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
