I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
