My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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