So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Randomize
