i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
i've created a new STD.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
