Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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