Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
