i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
MIDGETS
????
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize