Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
