Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize