Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
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