Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Just pee around me
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
