I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
