Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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