But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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