Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
