if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
