You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
