did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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