maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
