I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
He better not be in your backpack
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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