are you so shy because you have an std?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
