I hate all girls vehemently.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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