she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You've changed since you got that strap on
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
