real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize