Tell her she can't have a vagina
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
