it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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