My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
