not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
