How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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