are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
