I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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