Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
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