I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
