No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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