he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
