try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
