all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
