how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
