We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
