think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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