More tranny stories later!
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
